Love Rules for the People of God

Scripture: 1 John 4.7-12, 20-21


It was a pivotal time in the life of the church. I was in my tenth year as pastor and the church faced a crucial decision about the next step in ministry. We decided to have a series of informal congregational meetings once a month on Sunday evening to communicate our vision to the people and to hear their thoughts and concerns. It was soon apparent that opinions and emotions were running strong. Though I would later find out that there were a good many people who were undecided at the time, what it felt like then was the congregation had already split into two sides over the matter. After a sharing a few brief thoughts myself I opened up the floor for discussion. Little did I know at that moment that the plan for thoughtful dialogue was about to be tossed aside never to be recovered.

A man stood up in a side aisle, turned to face the gathering of about 75 people, and began making accusations of conspiracy and collusion on the part of some to ridicule and demonize those who stood against the vision plan. The man was angry, red-faced, and was not holding back. He insinuated, ridiculed, and excoriated his alleged enemies. He even named names. He did the very thing he was accusing others of doing, only then some. I spent the next six months, fruitlessly trying to mend relationships that he had hurt or destroyed in a couple minutes of thoughtless words. The vision plan failed.

What the issue was about is really inconsequential to the point of my story today. At the time I was so surprised and stunned by the intensity of the man’s vitriol that I was literally speechless. With the wisdom that comes with 20/20 hindsight I know what I would say now to the man. “Sit down! We don’t talk that way to each other in the Body of Christ. If you cannot speak to those with whom you disagree with love and respect, then don’t say anything at all.”

Love is the Rule of Conduct for the People of God. You could make the argument that it is the only unbreakable and unforgivable rule. You can mess up in a lot of ways and be forgiven. But you cannot fail to love your sister or brother in Christ. Why? Because it is the core of our identity in Christ as individuals and as the people of God.

“Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God.” That might seem so obvious to you as to go without saying, but too many times I’ve observed people break that cardinal rule in the church and in their families. The Apostle Paul goes so far as to call Love, the law of Christ. Love is the only Law that God lays down for us as New Testament Christians. You must love me and you must love one another. Remember, Jesus said these are the two great commandments!

And these two great commandments of Love are demonstrated, as I said last week, in the specifics and particularities of our relationships to each other. One reason I love the church (and love God) is that the church is associated in my mind with so many loving people and experiences of love – being held by my mother in church or sitting on my pappy’s lap as a boy; being encouraged and loved by truly good Sunday School teachers; being supported and nurtured by loving parishioners once I became a pastor. Just the other week my old church treasurer made the hour trip to Duncansville looking for me because she had made a fresh raspberry pie, which she knew was a favorite of mine, and she wanted to give it to me. Believe me, this was not an exceptional deed for this woman. She breathes love every day.

I am a Christian because others loved me in Jesus name. And I suspect that this is really your story too.

Pastor Rick Warren says that “People are looking not just for a friendly church, but for a church where there’s a possibility of finding a friend.” Absolutely! It’s not enough for us to be friendly or nice. Rich Mullins, author of Awesome God, has a lyric in one of his songs that goes, “Some people are friendly but they’ll never be your friend. Sometimes this has bent me to the ground.”

We must really love. We must really offer friendship. If we say that we are friends with God but not friends with each other, then the love and friendship of God is not in us and we are liars.

Going beyond just being a Friendly Church to a Church That Extends Friendship is to first realize that the Love of God always takes the initiative in welcoming the stranger and the friendless. “This is love; not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.” God took the initiative in love with all of us. So, also we ought to love one another.

Does this mean we will never disagree with each other or come to a matter from different perspectives? Of course not. In fact, that is a strength for us if we realize that conflict is an inevitable and natural part of living together as a community of love. What we will not allow is spite, ridicule, deceit, pride, or anything else that is obviously not love, to rule in love’s stead.

A story is told of a visitor to a monastery approaching the head abbot and congratulating the abbot on such a peaceful and harmonious place. The visitor then asks a question that the abbot had heard before, “Why do you live in a monastery? Why did you come here?”

The abbot replies, “Because there ought to be a place in the world where people love each other.”

I can’t think of a better definition of church or community. There are ought to be a place where people love one another. This is the Church a lonely and unbelieving world is looking for. They will know we are Christians by our love.